Roger Graham needs a kidney — the sooner, the better.
Graham, a 37-year-old New Hampshire resident, was very active and in good health with no family history of kidney disease when his kidneys suddenly failed during the summer of 2021.
Graham thus joined many other Americans waiting for a life-saving organ: Over 106,000 people are on the national transplant waiting list, according to Kidneyfund.org.
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“I was super tired all the time,” he told Fox News Digital of his main symptom. “I couldn’t really function. I was having a hard time basically doing day-to-day stuff.”
After sleeping through nearly an entire weekend, Graham finally went to the hospital — and was brought to the intensive care unit.
Roger Graham, 37, of New Hampshire, has awaited a new kidney for nearly two years. (Roger Graham)
“Then we found out that my kidneys just stopped working,” he said.
At first, doctors hoped the kidney failure was temporary, and that his kidneys “might just have taken a shock to the system and they were kind of like hibernating,” said Graham.
This was not the case, alas.
“We did a test, a biopsy, to see what was going on, and it showed that there’s just all scar tissue — so there’s no more filtration,” he said.
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Graham has been on the list for a kidney transplant since June 22, 2021.
While many people associate organ donations with deceased donors, most people in the United States who are in need of an organ transplant would benefit from a living donor.
A donation from a deceased donor is only possible in very few situations, Anne Paschke, media relations specialist at United Network for Organ Sharing, located in Richmond, Virginia, told Fox News Digital.
Kidneys are a vital organ, note medical professionals. Nearly 90% of people waiting for an organ transplant are waiting for a kidney. (iStock)
“Sadly, there aren’t enough donors for all the people who could benefit from a lifesaving transplant,” Paschke said. “Most people are surprised to learn that only those of us who die in a hospital on a ventilator are potential deceased organ donors.”
“More than 100,000 people are waiting for a lifesaving transplant,” Hilary Kleine, vice president, communications and registry operations at Donate Life America, also headquartered in Richmond, told Fox News Digital.
Of these 100,000, nearly 90,000 are waiting for a kidney, she noted.
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“Transplants rely on the generosity of organ, eye and tissue donors, and there are not enough donors to meet the need,” Kleine added.
Joining the registry is easy, she said.
“My main focus now is just to kind of stay alive and to find a kidney donor.”
“You can help by registering your decision to be a donor at your local DMV or at RegisterMe.org, and share your decision with your family and friends,” she said.
Graham’s best hope for a kidney is from a living donor, he said.
In the United States, about a third of all kidney transplants are done from a living donor, according to the Mayo Clinic’s website.
Above, doctors perform a kidney transplant. Once Graham receives a new kidney, his life will return to almost completely normal, he said. (BSIP/Universal Images Group via Getty Images)
There are many advantages to receiving a kidney from a living donor — namely, better survival rates, more convenient scheduling and a shorter wait time.
“Living-donor kidney transplant usually involves a donated kidney from someone you know, such as a family member, friend or co-worker,” said the Mayo Clinic. “Genetically related family members are most likely to be compatible living kidney donors.”
It was “a real eye-opener” to realize how unhealthy people can be without knowing it.
It is also possible to receive a kidney donation from a stranger, the site added, in what is called a “non-directed living kidney donor.”
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Becoming a living kidney donor is more complicated than simply having the same blood type as the recipient, according to the website for Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center, the hospital caring for Graham.
Living kidney donors have to be at least 21 years old and “without major medical or psychiatric illness.”
Those who smoke cigarettes are encouraged to quit, as tobacco usage has the potential for additional complications with the healing process, said the site.
Above, the main entrance to the Dartmouth-Hitchcock Medical Center in Lebanon, New Hampshire, where Graham is being treated. Graham hopes to receive a kidney transplant here. (Christopher Evans/MediaNews Group/Boston Herald via Getty Images)
Women who use birth control have to stop taking it a month before the donation, and cannot start again until three months after, due to the increased risk of blood clots.
Additionally, a person cannot take drugs with aspirin and other painkillers a week before surgery, said the website.
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“The ideal candidate is motivated and healthy,” the Dartmouth Hitchcock website points out.
“The evaluation process is strict because we need to ensure that the donor has two normal kidneys with great function and that they aren’t at risk for developing a disease or condition that could affect kidney function.”
Graham knows these struggles firsthand; he has had several potential donors fall through due to health issues.
Graham’s community has rallied behind him as he hunts for a kidney – employing unique advertising methods like this snowman holding a sign. (Roger Graham)
“We’ve had about almost 100 people sign up [to donate] between Mass General [Hospital] and Dartmouth Hitchcock, and not a single person has yet been approved,” he said. “So that’s been discouraging.”
One donor, for example, got to the point where a date for surgery was in the process of being scheduled — only to discover that the individual had kidney stones and was no longer eligible. Another potential donor was found to be pre-diabetic and was not allowed to donate, either.
“On top of that, you’re trying to search for a kidney while staying healthy enough to receive a kidney.”
It was “a real eye-opener” to realize how unhealthy people can be without knowing it, said Graham.
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Throughout this rollercoaster of a process, Graham said he’s been trying to stay positive, but some days are easier than others.
“I had a very good job,” he said, though he no longer works due to the severity of his condition. He also had to give up hobbies like sports.
“My main focus now is just to kind of stay alive and to find a kidney donor,” said Graham. “And it takes all of that time and energy just to do it.”
One of Graham’s passions is horseback riding, something that has taken a backseat since he got sick. “Kidney For Rog,” a Facebook group that’s helping Graham find a kidney, has been planning a benefit event later this month. (Roger Graham)
While Graham waits for his new kidney, he undergoes dialysis treatments three times a week, an “exhausting” process that takes about six hours, he said.
“You basically live in a chair, and then when you’re not doing dialysis, you’re tired from it and all of the side effects and the medication,” said Graham.
“As soon as the transplant is complete, and it’s a really good match … I basically go back to 100% of my normal life.”
“Then on top of that, you’re trying to search for a kidney while staying healthy enough to receive a kidney,” he said. “So that’s a whole other issue itself.”
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Graham has been on the hunt for this match for almost two years, he noted. He and his family have made signs for yards, fliers for his community and distributed magnets and stickers to place on cars — all advertising for an organ.
One of the ways Graham and his family have appealed for a new kidney is the distribution of large car magnets. Those interested could scan the QR code to register as a donor. (Roger Graham)
He’s even got a dedicated Facebook page – “Kidney for Rog” – that has links for upcoming events, updates on Graham’s health and general messages of support.
He’s been hoping there’s someone out there who is his perfect match who is willing to give him the gift of a lifetime: a gift of normalcy.
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“As soon as the transplant is complete, and it’s a really good match, I mean, I basically go back to 100% of my normal life,” Graham explained.
That would mean: no more dialysis. No more measuring everything he eats. Returning to work. Getting back to his hobbies, he said.
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Post-transplant, “after two months of recovery, I’m pretty much back on my feet full time, ready to rock and roll,” he said.
UPDATE: Just as this story was being published, Fox News Digital learned that Roger Graham went into transplantation surgery in the early morning hours of May 16; a donor kidney had become available to him.
