Reddit users assured a bride-to-be who chose a bridesmaid dress with the goal of convincing her future sister-in-law to drop out of the bridal party was within her rights to do so.
A user by the name of “BeautifulExplorer363” asked Reddit’s “Am I the A–hole” subreddit to weigh in on her actions in a Jan. 2, 2024 post, “AITA for picking a ‘revealing’ bridesmaid dress in order to get one of my bridesmaids to drop?”
In the post, the woman said the current conflict was “a long thing coming.”
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“My soon-to-be husband has a sister, let’s call her Mia,” wrote BeautifulExplorer363. “Mia and I do not click very well,” she wrote — but she is “polite.”
“I wouldn’t say we are friends,” she also wrote.
A woman shared on social media that she purposely selected a bridesmaid dress (not pictured) that she knew her future sister-in-law would not like in an effort to get her to drop out of the wedding party. (iStock)
As further context, BeautifulExplorer363 said that she never actually asked Mia to be in her bridal party — and that her future mother-in-law announced that Mia was a bridesmaid at a family gathering.
“I felt I was forced to make her a bridesmaid, or she [would] be sad,” wrote the bride.
Mia, said BeautifulExplorer363, is “very insecure” about her body as she is overweight.
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“This has led bridesmaid [dress] shopping to be a nightmare,” added the woman on Reddit, saying that she was unable to find something that Mia wanted and that all the other bridesmaids liked. She even went to four different shops, she noted.
“I gave everyone two options to vote on,” she said. “Option one was getting a dress that can be styled multiple ways, or picking from a collection so everyone matches, but they will need to pay for it.”
“She thinks I am a huge jerk, and I told her she can step down if she has issues with the dress.”
She added, “Option two was [that I would] buy everyone’s dress, but … I chose the dress and my decision is final.”
The bridesmaids — Mia included — picked option two, she said.
“I picked out a blue strapless dress with a mini slit,” she said. “I really like it and I knew Mia would have an issue with it.”
A bride-to-be said she gave her bridesmaids the option of either buying their own dress — or getting a dress for free that she chose. All of them, including her future sister-in-law, voted for her to pick the dress. But then things “blew up.” (iStock)
BeautifulExplorer363 then sent a picture of the dress to her bridesmaids, confirming their sizes before she placed the order.
“This is where it blew up,” she said — adding that Mia became angry over the choice of a “revealing dress.”
“This resulted in an argument where she thinks I am a huge jerk, and I told her she can step down if she has issues with the dress,” said BeautifulExplorer363.
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Apparently the sister-in-law tried unsuccessfully to lobby her family into supporting her, “but everyone knows I gave them options,” wrote the bride, “and had watched me struggle to find something everyone wants.”
BeautifulExplorer363 said she thought she might be in the wrong, as she “chose a revealing bridesmaid dress to get my future husband’s sister to drop from being a bridesmaid.”
The bride posted on Reddit’s “Am I the A–hole” subreddit, looking for advice on her situation. She received over 2,000 responses in just over a day. (Tiffany Hagler-Geard/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
Fox News Digital reached out to BeautifulExplorer363 for any updates, as well as to an etiquette expert for professional insight.
On the AITA subreddit, people can reply to posts and indicate the poster is “NTA” (“Not the A–hole”), “YTA” (“You’re the A–hole”), “NAH” (“No A–holes Here”) or “ESH” (“Everyone Sucks Here”).
Users can “upvote” comments they find helpful, and “downvote” those they do not.
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BeautifulExplorer363’s post received more than 2,000 replies in just over a day — and most said they were on her side and that she was “NTA.”
“The AH here is MIL and Mia. MIL for announcing Mia is bridesmaid, Mia for being difficult,” wrote a Reddit user by the name of “Certain-Chemistry756” in the top-upvoted comment.
“You offered options. She declined them. Her participation in your wedding is optional, one could say undesired,” wrote one commenter to the bride. (iStock)
“I’m fat and if I don’t fit [in] the same dress as everyone else, I’d have voted for buying my own from a collection,” the user wrote. “Sometimes the bridesmaids have to wear a dress they wouldn’t pick out because they respect the bride’s choice.”
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Others concurred with that.
“Sometimes the bridesmaids have to wear a dress they wouldn’t pick out because they respect the bride’s choice.”
“Mia voted for the ‘you pick and your word is final’ (aka the one where Mia doesn’t have to spend money),” said Reddit user “axw3555.”
Axw3555 continued, “If she didn’t want that, then she should have voted the other way.”
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Said another Reddit user, “indicatprincess,” “You offered options. She declined them. Her participation in your wedding is optional, one could say undesired.”
This same commenter also wrote, “Everyone knows by now it is typical for a bride to chose how she’d like her bridesmaids to appear. Mia doesn’t get to override the preference of everyone else simply because she is insecure with her body type.”
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