Love from within: 5 easy ways to create fulfilling love without dating apps, according to experts


Being single on Valentine’s Day can be annoying for some people — but so can dating.

And at a time when online dating is the new norm, experts say there are easier ways to drum up love without swiping for it.

Dr. Susan Albersis, a psychologist at Cleveland Clinic in Ohio, told Fox News Digital in a statement that online dating is a “double-edged sword.” 

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“On one hand, it creates wonderful connections,” she said. 

“The downside is that it can often bruise your self-esteem.”

woman swipes on dating app

People searching for love might want to consider putting the “dating apps aside,” suggested a wellness expert. (iStock)

“Many singles struggle with rejection, competition or extreme pressure to create a false front or to be perfect online.”

Dating apps are “just one tool for finding a significant other,” Albersis said, encouraging singles who are feeling burned out or frustrated to take a break from the process.

“Know that your self-worth is not linked to the outcome of potential matches.”

“But don’t give up,” she added. “Invest in your day-to-day relationships, hobbies and your self-esteem.” 

“Know that your self-worth is not linked to the outcome of potential matches.”

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Kimberly Snyder, a multiple-time New York Times bestselling author and holistic wellness expert, agreed that people searching for love might want to consider putting “dating apps aside.”

In an interview with Fox News Digital, the Los Angeles-based Snyder — who is also the founder of Solluna, a health and beauty company — said most people believe that love comes from outside sources, such as the adoration of significant others, family members or fans on social media.

“But really, you don’t ‘get’ love from others,” she said. “It’s just that some people prompt you to feel the love that is already there in you.” 

kimberly snyder headshot

Kimberly Snyder is a multiple-time New York Times bestselling author, holistic wellness expert and founder of the health and beauty company Solluna. “It’s key to work on yourself first, so you can radiate magnetic, confident energy,” she said about finding a love match.  (Solluna)

“As we step into more alignment with love, we find that we have love inside of us — and we are the ones we’ve been seeking love from all along.”

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While some might find dating apps and other digital platforms to be an efficient way to find love, Snyder said it’s important to approach it with the “right energy and attitude.”

“Otherwise, you can come off as desperate — which isn’t going to attract the kind of love you want,” she said. 

“That’s why it’s key to work on yourself first, so you can radiate magnetic, confident energy.” 

Woman heart sweater

Singles should “shift to a more empowering perspective of love where you are the source, versus desperately trying to seek it,” said one expert. (iStock)

This Valentine’s Day, Snyder encouraged singles to “shift to a more empowering perspective of love where you are the source, versus desperately trying to seek it.”

Here are five simple steps to create fulfilling love from within, she suggested.

1. Start your day with an act of love

Give love as an action to the “first being” you interact with every day, said Synder, whether that means hugging a pet or a child — or texting a loved one.

“How you start the day sets the energetic tone for the day. Little, simple acts of giving out love makes love a verb, something you are living versus a thing you are trying to get.”

man with his dog

Give love to the “first being” you interact with every day, whether that is hugging a pet or child, or even texting a loved one, suggested one wellness expert. (iStock)

Putting love out into the world could “further empower” the realization that “you are the source of love,” according to Snyder.

“This will make you more magnetic,” she said. “Being loving, by sharing loving words over text or verbally, or hugging those around you, is a great way to start the day.”

2. Make yourself a morning beverage with intention

Making a morning beverage, such as hot water with lemon, as a “simple daily act of self-love” can reinforce the notion that “you are worthy of nourishment and care,” Snyder said.

While lemon water is “great for your digestion and provides extra vitamin C,” it also doesn’t require any fancy preparation, she noted.

woman cuts lemon in a kitchen

Taking the time in the morning to make a healthy beverage is a “simple daily act of self-love,” the expert said. (iStock)

“Be intentional as you cut and squeeze the lemon and warm the water,” she said.

“The intention as you do this ritual is to promote self-love in yourself because you are a source of love.”

3. Think of three things that bring you gratitude

Showing gratitude “switches your energy instantly from a lack of love to active love,” according to Snyder.

“Any time you feel stressed out, frustrated, irritated or have a moment of self-doubt, it constricts your energy,” she said. 

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“If you switch your focus to gratitude — on what is here in your life now — it will help you to embody more abundant wholeness — a state of love.”

Snyder recommended thinking of “simple things to be grateful for” that are often taken for granted, such as a warm shower, a beautiful houseplant or even cherished loved ones.

woman waters plants

Thinking of three things you’re grateful for each day can help generate love, an expert said. “Switch your focus to gratitude,” she said. (iStock)

4. Look for ways to perform acts of kindness

Fulfilling an act of kindness can be a simple task, Snyder said, including bringing muffins to your child’s teacher or sharing kind words with a coworker who is having a hard time.

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“These are examples of small but daily ways to serve others,” she said. “The more we serve, the more we expand our identity beyond the small ‘me,’ into greater connection with the whole.”

She added, “The more connected we are on the whole, the more connected we are to love.”

5. Do a short but powerful heart-based meditation

Research shows that the electromagnetic field of the heart is “far stronger” than that of the brain, according to Snyder.

meditation class

Practicing heart-based meditation can help “drop your awareness and attention into your heart,” a wellness expert advised. (iStock)

Instead of sitting with constant, racing thoughts during a meditation session, Snyder advised people to “drop your awareness and attention into your heart.”

“Little, simple acts of giving out love makes love a verb – something you are living versus a thing you are trying to get.”

“Focus on your heart and breathe in love and appreciation, using an event or loved one to help you self-generate that feeling,” she suggested. 

“Then breathe out love and appreciate yourself and all surrounding you, and the greater collective.” 

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“This way, you can become a real embodiment of love, which will only attract more love as it brings forward more of the energy of love — right here, right now.”

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