We set him up with Taylore, 26, who is a secretary at a law firm. She signed up on a lark when a group of friends said they would apply to Date Lab. However, she was the only one who followed through. The Long Island native believes in the power of setups because her parents met on a blind date and they’re about to have their 30th wedding anniversary. Previously, she has been set up primarily through friends.
Her dating mantra: “Go in with low expectations. You don’t know if you found ‘the one’ right away. Go on a few dates.” She is drawn to people who stay active. “I’m attracted to people who like to go to the gym a couple of times a week and like to talk about it. A lot of my week is spent working out.”
We sent the pair to Capa Tosta, which serves casual Italian cuisine in Columbia Heights. Tom arrived first, followed shortly by Taylore. His first impression: “She was attractive, upfront and confident right away.” Taylore told me the first thing she noticed was that “he was blond,” and she normally goes for brunettes. However, she was “willing to give it a shot.”
Over cocktails, they got to know each other. “He was funny and quiet. I tend to be a loud person. He got my jokes right away,” Taylore said. “We were able to bond over New York and Chicago rivalries: for example, pizza. I give deep dish a pass since it’s close to Sicilian.” Tom admitted to being on the quiet side when the date started, but eventually he loosened up.
The conversation took a macabre turn when Taylore brought up “bog people,” ancient human remains that were naturally mummified in wetlands. Tom appreciated her enthusiasm for the topic because he felt she was being “authentic.” A discussion on how they would want to be buried followed. “She said in a bog. I joked that I wanted a Viking funeral — put me on a boat and set me on fire,” Tom recalled. From there, they moved on to true crime. Taylore told me that she had a book on serial killer John Wayne Gacy in her purse but didn’t bring it up because “it probably would’ve ruined the ambiance of the date.”
Over dinner, penne alla vodka for her and pasta Bolognese for him, they discussed their childhoods. “I am from a very Irish Catholic community, and we had similar upbringings,” Tom said. “We talked about growing up with Catholic guilt and how we’re trying not to fall into those issues now.” Taylore found Tom’s Catholic humor to be “a really big plus.” “He said, ‘We don’t talk about our emotions. We like to shove it deep down inside.’ I’m pretty sure my mom has told me that,” she relayed with a laugh.
One thing that resonated with Taylore and made her feel connected to Tom was that they both were encouraged to leave where they grew up and spread their wings. “Our parents wanted us to make our own way in the world,” she said. “It’s a Catholic thing.”
For Tom, the only minor disconnect was that Taylore doesn’t do leftovers. “I’ve done projects on food-waste reduction, so my thing is always to try to make food last,” he said. Taylore explained to me: “I don’t believe in getting leftovers. If you aren’t going to finish your meal there, it won’t be fresh, so it defeats the point. It’s like a sadder version of something delicious.”
After more than three hours, the date wrapped up when Taylore mentioned that she had to walk her dog. Before they said their goodbyes, Tom handed her a pre-written postcard with a thank-you note and his phone number, figuring that if she liked him she would text and then he could ask her out again. “She actually collects postcards, so that was a good connection,” he said. I asked him if he regretted not asking for her number while on the date. “I probably should’ve exchanged numbers. I just wasn’t thinking.”
Taylore was delighted with the postcard and “thought it was really funny.” She told me that she planned on texting Tom. “I’m a firm believer that you aren’t going to know on the first date. Just go on a couple of more dates and just see.”
Tom: 4.5 [out of 5]. “It was lively, and we had good conversation for a first date.”
Taylore: 5. “There was no awkward pausing, and we had a lot to talk about.”
Taylore texted Tom. However, they have not gone on another date.
Vijai Nathan is a writer and comedian in Washington.
Editor’s note: Because of privacy and safety concerns, Date Lab allows participants to be identified only by their first names.
A reminder from the Date Lab team: Our daters volunteer to participate in the column. While we appreciate a lively discussion assessing our matchmaking skills, please follow our community rules and do not comment on someone’s appearance or write a personal attack.
is 26 and works in international agricultural development. He is looking for someone who likes to be “out and about.”
is 26 and is a secretary at a law firm. She is seeking someone “down-to-earth, not too serious, but can understand and respect their partner.”
